Top 10 forgettables

It’s that time of year when we take a glance in life’s rear-view mirror, think “I still need to lose weight,” and reflect on the top stories of the year. This year, however, many are lumping together 2000-2009 and eyeing the top stories of the decade.

(Yes, I was among those feverously arguing 10 years ago that a decade and century end in 0 instead of 9. I still acknowledge that as fact, but bow to an overwhelming public desire to define a decade by the next-to-last figure.)

Here, instead, let’s take a look at those big news stories from the past 10 years that really are not so big after all.

Leading my list of It’s Not Really A Big Story is an easy, though perhaps bold, selection: Tiger Woods’ alleged infidelities.

The clamor over Woods’ accident, the question of whether his wife’s initial purpose for the golf club was offensive or heroic, the numbering of relationships he’s had, the effects on the tour and Woods’ marketing value ... is all a bunch of hoopla.

I stand ready to acknowledge Tiger Woods as one of the top athletes of the decade, but I learned long ago to not attach anything loftier than play-making ability to athletes, entertainment ability to actors and musicians, and policy-making ability to politicians.

Regrettably.

There was a time when we attempted to identify athletes, actors, singers and politicians as role models. Most people have abandoned the concept, having been burnt too many times.

I do not believe they are any worse than what we used to have, but today we get far too much information. There is no place for them to hide.

A Super Guy

Tiger Woods, it seemed, might have been an exception. Easily we fell into that opinion because he is exceptional in just about every aspect of golf. Accentuating that belief was the realization that his success was not simply raw skill. No, he worked diligently at his game, including taking personal fitness to a level unrealized by most golfers. He would have a bad tournament and would work his game back to the superior level.

Watching that, we forgot that he was not only human but a human superstar. Too many of them crater into a black hole of disappointment.

However, this is not a top story of the past decade. He will likely work his way out of it and his golfing skills will again become our focus. If he doesn’t, even if he should decide he has all the money he needs and becomes a hermit, we will soon figure out that life is unaffected by his absence, much less the number of women he knew.

Rounding out my top 10 (meaning, the next nine that came to mind) are: “Sex in the City,” reality TV, Britney Spears or Miley Cyrus, wardrobe malfunction, convict Martha Stewart, vice-presidential shootings, Pluto’s status as a planet, “balloon boy” and undeniable evidence Barack Obama was born in Hawaii.

Of course we learned in this decade that one of the previous decade’s biggest stories was all for naught as the millennium bug failed to tickle, much less cripple, world technology on 1-1-00.

Remember that? Well, Tiger Woods’ sleeping habits will be even more forgettable 10 years from now.
(c) 2009 by Steve Martaindale